She’s seventy now, you know, she’s had a full life.
This is Hillary of whom I speak, you know the one I mean, Bill used to call his little wife.
She’s been at it since she was a little girl.
“Give me a chance, let me have your support.”
It’s time for us all to give her a whirl.
But wouldn’t it be neat, supporters say,
to finally see a woman sitting pretty
in the nation’s top seat?
Monica might have been up against the wall ….
But Hillary’d be right there in the Oval Office, as her husband wanders about the halls.
Hillary’s got the balls, her friends insist.
She says they’re even bigger than Bill’s.
“I’m not afraid of war, I’m ready to kill.”
This dame is tough
She’s got the right stuff.
Just ask the Secret Service: she plays rough.
I for one can’t wait to see her at the top of the Capital stairs, hand held high,
Swearing once again never ever to lie.
Some think her a hawk, but she’s above all a dove.
Don’t you be fooled.
She may act like a thug, but she’s all about love.
It’s not a bad idea; it’ll set a precedent,
She’ll run as Sister Hillary, queen of the people,
Loyal wife to Brother Bill and former WH resident.
Homophobic? Xenophobic? Islamophobic?
Hillary’s on to you, you idiots.
With this PC crap, she thinks we’re all bigots.
Nobody likes her, but is that even true?
The Chinese do and so too Saudi Princes and the Emir of Qatar.
Blood thirsty Mugabe once called her his bright star.
Monkey brains will be fine, she told him, they taste just like stew.
Look under the table, there’s something for you.
Just fill up the bag; only fresh bills will do.
It all goes to charity, she says, we’re doing a world of good.
At this rate, Bill promises, we’ll have more money than anyone should.
And don’t forget Imelda that other royal felon.
Hillary envies her world famous collection,
She covets that pair the color of melon.
But these other dames are nothing compared to what Hillary intends to be.
It’s that other dynamo of the trailers, Tanya, who jabbed innocent Nancy in the knee.
Hillary can handle it, there’s no question of that.
We’ll get a woman this time, but who’ll be next?
How about a guy who doesn’t speak but can text?
Some would say, let’s go with a gay or couldn’t it just be a cute divorcee?
The important thing at the end of the day
is to feel that we haven’t turned anyone away.
That’s enough of that: this is a mighty lady.
We’re talking power and brains to boot.
There are miles to go and countries to loot.
Jamie Glazov’s new poem “In Your Eyes” was just published in Liberty Island.
Dynamo of the Trailers, a poem
By David Lohrey
She’s seventy now, you know, she’s had a full life.
This is Hillary of whom I speak, you know the one I mean, Bill used to call his little wife.
She’s been at it since she was a little girl.
“Give me a chance, let me have your support.”
It’s time for us all to give her a whirl.
But wouldn’t it be neat, supporters say,
to finally see a woman sitting pretty
in the nation’s top seat?
Monica might have been up against the wall ….
But Hillary’d be right there in the Oval Office, as her husband wanders about the halls.
Hillary’s got the balls, her friends insist.
She says they’re even bigger than Bill’s.
“I’m not afraid of war, I’m ready to kill.”
This dame is tough
She’s got the right stuff.
Just ask the Secret Service: she plays rough.
I for one can’t wait to see her at the top of the Capital stairs, hand held high,
Swearing once again never ever to lie.
Some think her a hawk, but she’s above all a dove.
Don’t you be fooled.
She may act like a thug, but she’s all about love.
It’s not a bad idea; it’ll set a precedent,
She’ll run as Sister Hillary, queen of the people,
Loyal wife to Brother Bill and former WH resident.
Homophobic? Xenophobic? Islamophobic?
Hillary’s on to you, you idiots.
With this PC crap, she thinks we’re all bigots.
Nobody likes her, but is that even true?
The Chinese do and so too Saudi Princes and the Emir of Qatar.
Blood thirsty Mugabe once called her his bright star.
Monkey brains will be fine, she told him, they taste just like stew.
Look under the table, there’s something for you.
Just fill up the bag; only fresh bills will do.
It all goes to charity, she says, we’re doing a world of good.
At this rate, Bill promises, we’ll have more money than anyone should.
And don’t forget Imelda that other royal felon.
Hillary envies her world famous collection,
She covets that pair the color of melon.
But these other dames are nothing compared to what Hillary intends to be.
It’s that other dynamo of the trailers, Tanya, who jabbed innocent Nancy in the knee.
Hillary can handle it, there’s no question of that.
We’ll get a woman this time, but who’ll be next?
How about a guy who doesn’t speak but can text?
Some would say, let’s go with a gay or couldn’t it just be a cute divorcee?
The important thing at the end of the day
is to feel that we haven’t turned anyone away.
That’s enough of that: this is a mighty lady.
We’re talking power and brains to boot.
There are miles to go and countries to loot.